Flashback Friday - Service? What's That?

This post originally appeared on Minxeats.com on June 3, 2007. I remember this meal very well.

We have been back to Michael's and it was much better. No sign of the annoying waitress either.

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Last night I went out to dinner with my friend Stacey and her friend Alex. Friday night at 7pm is a bad time for dining out in Baltimore if one doesn't have a reservation, but we gave it a shot. Alex wanted seafood, mentioning crab cakes in particular, so I did a quick Google search to see where they might be found in the northern Baltimore County area. I knew Ocean Pride would be packed, and they were. We definitely didn't want to wait 45 minutes, so headed further up York Road. I had never been to Michael's Café, but read that they had crabcakes, so we gave it a go. Unfortunately for us, they could accomodate us right away. At least, we got to sit down. Actual accomodation was a long time in coming.

Right away, our waitress came up to recite a list of specials in her bizarrely nasal Minnie Mouse with strep throat voice. She took Alex's drink order for an iced tea and left. A minute or so later, she brought the tea, and a small plate of butter, and then disappeared for a bit. Which was fine. Since one of us is constantly talking, I needed the extra time to grab a minute here and there to actually concentrate on the menu. Bread eventually came, but Minnie Mouse disappeared fast without taking our order. After what seemed like an eternity, she returned and we requested the seared Ahi tuna, calamari, and crab/shrimp dip appetizers. Alex and I ordered crab cakes for our entrees, and Stacey decided on scallops. And because some of us really needed a drink, I selected a bottle of Ravenswood Zinfandel, very nicely priced at $25.

Alex's side salad came first, a decent-enough looking mix of greens and other salad veggies, with dressing on the side. Unfortunately, it looked as if the dressing cup had come off of someone else's plate - it was barely half-full. Alex wanted extra dressing, so needed the waitress. When she arrived with our wine (presenting it to Stacey, even though I was the one who ordered it), her response to the request for extra dressing was, "no." Considering we had been sitting in the restaurant for about 45 minutes already and had only gotten one salad, some rolls, and now wine, I didn't think Minnie had any right to attempt humor. She did bring the dressing with the appetizers, which we fell upon with vigor.

The ahi tuna was quite nice, albeit outrageously priced at $12. (One can get a more generous portion of even o-toro for less at a reputable sushi restaurant.) Seven long thin slices of tuna, raw in the middle and crusted with peppercorns and sesame seeds, lay atop mesclun greens dressed in a nice soy vinaigrette, with small dollops of wasabi sauce and a Thousand Island-looking aioli at the compass points. The tuna was delicious, as were the greens, and a larger portion of both would have made a nice dinner in itself. The menu claims that the calamari is "hand breaded," but I believe those hands worked for a frozen seafood plant somewhere far away. The adequate portion of squid, both rings and tentacles, were unexceptional, the bland breading tasting of nothing, and the accompanying marinara was merely something red and wet in which to dip the seafood. As for the crab and shrimp dip, I was hard-pressed to find any actual seafood in the pink-colored cream cheese goo, but it was tasty enough slathered on the crisp slices of garlic bread that came with it.

Surprisingly, the entrees came not long after the dinner plates were cleared. At least the kitchen's timing was good, if not the waitress'. Each of us got two vegetables with our protein, but somehow my green beans ended up on Alex's plate. Minnie Mouse went to fetch some for me and actually did arrive before I was finished eating. My single crab cake was full of lump crab, with very little binder, but it was overall fairly bland and needed more seasoning of some sort. The side of tartar sauce tasted weird, and I didn't bother with the cocktail sauce, since I don't think it goes with crabcakes. The potato, baked in foil, was predictably arid, but the beans, once they arrived, were cooked perfectly crisp and bright green; slicked with a touch of fat of some sort, all they needed was a bit of salt to bring out their flavor. Stacey's scallops came in a ghost-white creamy wine sauce, but the generous portion was well-cooked and flavorful. Her side of beets came from a can. Alex did not comment on the quality of her entree, but I did notice her request for mayonnaise (presumably for her fries) was never fufilled.

Minnie Mouse's appearances at our table were sporadic, and she never seemed to be around when we needed her. For instance, when our appetizers arrived, she still had not brought Stacy a place setting or napkin. After her fork ended up with the dirty appetizer dishes, she was not given a replacement with which to eat her entree until she managed to flag someone down. When pouring my wine, Minnie slopped it all over the base of my glass, and I was afraid to lift it lest I dribble on my shirt. She offered to bring a napkin to clean it, but that took 10 minutes. By the end of the meal, we were completely exasperated and opted to find dessert elsewhere. It was close to 9:30 p.m. when we left the restaurant, and I noticed the table next to ours was turned over twice while we were there. Oddly enough, they had the same waitress.

Although parts of the meal were enjoyable, I can't say I plan to return to Michael's Café. It's a standard, run-of-the-mill Maryland seafood restaurant, somewhat dingy, with mostly unexceptional food and poor service. We were seated within sniffing distance of the restrooms (which are badly located behind a short partition and which open directly into the dining room) and practically on top of a service station with various piles of whatnot on it but not useful things like napkins and silverware. Some attention to detail was evident in the meal: the green beans; the nice crisp dinner rolls; the perfectly cooked tuna. But other signs suggested the kitchen was on auto-pilot: the half-full salad dressing; the canned beets; the dull calamari. I can't blame the fact that it was prime time on a Friday night - the place was full but not busy, there was no line to get in, and the pace overall seemed to be quite leisurely. Nobody looked harried, distraught, or overworked.

Michael's is a place that has its regulars, and indeed I knew one gentleman who confessed to eating there every weekend, at the bar. That's well and good for them, if they like what they get. They can have it.

Michael's Cafe Raw Bar & Grill
2119 York Rd
Timonium, MD 21093
(410) 252-2022

Posted on Minxeats.com.

A Few Meals in Charles County

A couple weeks back we spent some time in Charles County as we attended the Potomac Snakehead Tournament with our friends Fran and Bill. For research purposes - we weren't doing any actual fish-wrangling. We heard that there were few choices for decent food in the area, apart from the usual chain restaurants. Most of those were in Waldorf, but we stayed a few miles down the road in La Plata where choices were even fewer. We did *not* want to dine at the Applebee's, even ironically, so we did a little research and came up with a place called Captain Billy's Crab House in Popes Creek.

It was a Saturday night and when we rolled up to Captain Billy's, the parking lot was packed and there was a line out the door. We put our name in at the hostess booth, got a buzzer, and went to sit outside and wait. It had been a hot day, but the evening was breezy and our wait was not unpleasant in the least. We got in some good people-watching and selfie-taking, and found that Charles County is pretty inexpensive. The guys went in to bring us drinks. For $18, they got two Sam Adams drafts and two jumbo pina coladas that weren't top shelf but weren't bad, either. In any case, it occupied us for part of our 40 minute wait.

Eventually, we were shown to a table and ordered some grub. Mr Minx and I were starving, having eating little more than some Trader Joe's muhammara and Triscuits in the 12 hours since our 8am breakfast. I declared as much to our waitress, who did an admirable job of taking care of us despite the hordes of people around us.

A while after we ordered,, our dining companions' side salads arrived. We were not prescient enough to know that the kitchen was backed up and hot food was coming out slowly, so we could only watch them eat. Our waitress, knowing we were hungry, brought us a conciliatory dish of hush puppies. They looked more like tiny potatoes than hush puppies, but they tasted great and we fell on them with gusto.

Some minutes later, she brought more apologies and a plate of steamed shrimp. Those were also quickly dispatched.

Finally, we received our entrees.

I ordered the fried oyster dinner with sides of excellent fresh cole slaw and rather characterless boiled green beans. The oysters were nicely cooked, and the batter had a good crunch--there was just too much of it, and I noticed pockets of raw batter here and there.

Mr Minx got the broiled seafood platter, which came with a plump crab cake, shrimp, scallops, and a fish fillet. It was the most expensive thing we ordered, at $30, but we figured that seafood on the Western shore, in a restaurant right on the Potomac, couldn't be bad.

We were wrong.

The shrimp and scallops were fine. Bill had scallops too, and he enjoyed them, but the crab cake was all shades of wrong. For one thing, it had bits of bell pepper in it. One expects incorrectly-made crab cakes in Pittsburgh, but not in Maryland. I'm sorry, but one simply does not put bell pepper in crab cakes. Crab imperial, ok. Not crab cakes. Not only that, the cakes were so full of breading as to be mushy, and I guarantee the crab was sourced somewhere in Asia. The fish was tilapia, which I wouldn't feed my dog. I don't know how humans eat it. Yeah, so it's marketed as a mild-tasting white fish, but farm-raised tilapia (which is pretty much all of it) tastes like its own waste products. That's not a mild flavor, sorry.

The fries were from a bag in the freezer, but they were palatable, and the apple sauce was good. Fran ordered crabcake sliders. Hers didn't have bell peppers, and she ate them, but I can't imagine they tasted any better than the crab cake Mr Minx had.

Still, our waitress' kindness went a long way, and despite issues, I'm going to say our meal at Captain Billy's was successful: we didn't go back to our hotel hungry.

The next morning, we had breakfast at Pancakes Plus, in beautiful downtown La Plata. I had read somewhere on teh Innernets that this place served the "best breakfast in Charles County," and while I've never had breakfast elsewhere in that area, I must concur.

The place is tiny - 8 tables and a dozen+ stools at an L-shaped counter - and it was packed. There were stools available at different places at the counter, so we physically moved them to one end so we could sit together. I indulged in a North-meets-South breakfast of scrapple, grits, and over-medium eggs with toast for less than $6. Everything was great, the coffee was impressively tasty, and the pancakes that both Fran and Mr Minx ordered were enormous. Side orders of bacon were generous. And we didn't need to eat again until late that evening.

Were I to find myself in Charles County again, I'd definitely go back for breakfast at Pancakes Plus. I'd skip Captain Billy's though, and see what there was to eat in Waldorf, instead. But I hear from a good source that there are some pretty good BBQ places dotting the county, so that might be a better option.





Posted on Minxeats.com.

Pappas Cockeysville

The Taylor Avenue location of Pappas Restaurant, thought by many to have the best crab cakes in Baltimore, has been a landmark for local diners since 1972. Now they have expanded to a new location in Cockeysville, adding a spacious sports bar to compliment the restaurant offerings. The Minx and I had already visited the new Pappas when it first opened and were quite happy with our experience, so when we were invited to a media tasting of their new menu and cocktails, we didn't have to be asked twice.

We started with some appetizers, including a seafood sampler of mini crab cakes, calamari, scallops, and shrimp. The calamari was tender, which is always important. The crab cakes were delicious; the Minx thought they were even better than their larger counterparts.

We were also served Santa Fe eggrolls, which were not unlike mini chimichangas, and a rich crab dip with lightly fried pita chips. Chef Carlos Zea, who hails from Ecuador, is not afraid of spice. Everything was well seasoned.

One member of our party ordered raw oysters, and seemed pretty pleased with them.

For my entree I chose the salmon dijon. Salmon can be difficult to cook and serve at just the right level of doneness, but my salmon was cooked through without being dry and flaky. The creamy sauce had a pleasant lightness to it thanks to the tangy dijon mustard, and the ample amount of mushrooms brought an earthiness to the dish.

The Minx went for the chicken Chesapeake, which is a chicken breast topped with broiled crab imperial. As with salmon, chicken breast has a danger of becoming overcooked, but the breast was quite tender. Every element on the plate was nicely seasoned, including the green beans. In fact, all the dishes we've had at Pappas show a great deal of care when it comes to seasoning.

Just like their flagship restaurant, Pappas in Cockeysville is a great place for a satisfying lunch or dinner seven days a week, but the new location's sports bar offers a welcome spot for a drink and a light meal. Happy hour starts at 11 am (yes, that's not a typo) and lasts until 7 pm with drafts and rail drinks at $3. They also offer tasty mule drinks for $5 and $2 off wines by the glass. To keep things hopping, there's live music every Wednesday and Friday nights and late night trivia on Tuesday nights starting at 11 pm. Even if you don't have time to hang around, you can always order from the carry out menu.

* Any products in this post that are mentioned by name may have been provided to Minxeats by the manufacturer. However, all opinions belong to Minxeats.

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Posted on Minxeats.com.

Pappas

Pappas Restaurant has been around since 1972. Even today, Joe Mannix (splendidly attired in a large-scale Glen plaid sportscoat) would be perfectly at home in the main dining room, grooving to Tony Bennett and Frank Sinatra. Mike Connors is 87; I'm not saying that's the average age of Pappas' diners, but Mr Minx and I were definitely among the youngest people in the place, nearly half-full at 5:30 on a Thursday.

The menu probably hasn't changed all that much in the last forty years, apart from the additions of jalapeno poppers, chicken wings, and tiramisu in the 80s, fried calamari and orange roughy in the 90s. The rest is old-school Baltimore: seafood, steaks, and Italian-style dishes, served with two veg or a salad and one veg, presented in little side bowls, diner-style. The big draw at Pappas is the crab cake, a monstrous 8oz pile of colossal lump crab that was featured on the cover of Baltimore Magazine's July 2009 issue.

But first, soup.

We each had a bowl of Pappas' Maryland crab soup. The flavorful and well-seasoned tomato-y broth was chock full of vegetables including miraculously non-mushy lima beans. I would have liked some more crab, but overall, the soup was pretty good.

The first time we went to Pappas was last Spring, while we were writing the Food Lovers' Guide to Baltimore. I ordered the broiled scallops, which were bland and overcooked. Mr Minx ordered the crab cake, and loved it. This time, I got the crab cake and he ordered stuffed shrimp, a childhood favorite. 

Three jumbo shrimp were broiled and topped with a huge mound of crab imperial, and broiled again. The imperial - which was pleasantly moist but not over-mayonnaised - had a nice brown glaze from the broiler, but the shrimp, which had been cooked twice at this point, were a little tough. 

My crab cake was impressively large and bursting with huge chunks of crab. The binder tasted like a mixture of mayo and mustard, and there was little, if any, crab spice, so the naturally sweet flavor of the crab shone through. One of my main issues with crab cakes made with huge lumps of crab is that if breading is used, it presents itself as pockets of mush that serve as spackle between the pieces of meat. This was the case with my cake at Pappas. One of my other issues is dryness, but Pappas' crab cake was nicely moist.

Our sides were fine. The broccoli was served plain, unseasoned, but had been perfectly cooked. Mr Minx's fries were standard issue. My "jackknife" potato, which I had ordered because I had no idea what it was, ended up being a fluffy mashed potato-like creation flavored with bacon and paprika and broiled until the top had a bit of crispness.

Overall, it was a good meal. We appreciated the dish of cool, crisp, sliced cucumbers and celery that we nibbled as we perused the menu. The service was attentive but not obtrusive. And the food was good. If you're looking for something fancy, go elsewhere, but if you want something that resembles a mountain of crab meat, then Pappas is your place.

Pappas
1725 Taylor Ave
Parkville, MD 21234
(410) 661-4357
http://www.pappasparkville.com/





Posted on Minxeats.com.

Soft Shell Crabs

It took a long time before I was willing to try a soft shell crab. While I had loved eating hard crabs since birth (well, practically), eating a crab whole, shell and all, seemed too close to eating giant spiders. Once in a while my Dad would bring a couple of fresh ones home and pan-fry them in butter. No matter how much cajoling he did, I refused to even taste one. And I was a kid who would try just about anything once (and usually more than once).

It wasn't until I was into my 30s 40s adulthood that I gave in and tried a soft shell. I was with my bestie, Kate, at Harry's Seafood Grill in Wilmington, Delaware, where she had ordered a soft shell crab sandwich. I realized that as a fairly new food blogger I no longer had the luxury of being a wimp when it came to trying new foods. She gave me a bite of the crab's body, because the legs still freaked me out a little, and whaddya know - I liked it!

Today, I eat soft shells whenever I can. And I actually prefer the legs.

I enjoy maki sushi with soft shell crab, particularly the end pieces that have the crunchy legs sticking out. I also adore the soft shell po' boy at Cajun Kate's in Boothwyn, PA. But most often I get my soft crab fix from Mo's Seafood in Towson. A single soft shell crab, served with one veg (cole slaw is my choice) and a piece of toast for sandwiching, is $12, and two are $20. If  you ask nicely, you can replace one of the soft shells with a backfin crab cake (also $12 each/2 for $20). The waitress will tell you they're not supposed to do that, but they will. While Mo's crab cakes are generously breaded, they taste good, and the combination of soft and crunchy crab makes for a nice duo.

Do you like soft shells? How do you like them prepared?

P.S. Do read Kit Pollard's story on soft shells in the Baltimore Sun. I'm quoted.



Posted on Minxeats.com.

Padonia Station's Tuesday Crabcake Special

Every Tuesday, from 11am to 1am, Padonia Station offers their 1/2 lb crab cake with two sides for eleven bucks, eat in or carry out. Can't beat that!

Mr Minx and I tried the crab cakes last week - since I was being "good" and chose a side of steamed broccoli, I went for the fried version. (It's been ages since I've had a fried crab cake!) Mr Minx chose the broiled version and a side of fries. Could have been my imagination, but the fried crabcake tasted more of the typical Old Bay spices, while the broiled cake seemed a bit more "herb-y." Both were nicely meaty. Slaw and broccoli were pretty good, too.

Tomorrow is Tuesday, so if you want to get in on the deal...just head on over to Padonia Station.

Padonia Station
63 E Padonia Rd
Timonium, MD 21093
(410) 252-8181

Jack's Bistro

I've been wanting to check out Jack's Bistro in Canton for a couple of years now. I'd add it to my short list of places to visit during Restaurant Week, but Mr Minx never seemed to be interested. This time, however, there was interest, possibly caused by the term sous vide that featured prominently in two entree offerings. Finally an opportunity to try this technique that we've been hearing so much about!

According to their Web site, Jack's doesn't take reservations for small parties, so Mr Minx and I made sure to get there early one evening to guarantee a table. Wise decision, as there were several other parties interested in eating before 6pm. Immediately upon entering the corner rowhouse in which Jack's is located, I was confused. There's a vague hipster vibe to the place, but it's a bit muddled. Exposed brick walls were decorated with pseudo-retro 60s prints, and the B-52s were playing on the sound system when we came in. The servers all wore somber black, but the very effusive hostess didn't seem dressed for the occasion. What does this have to do with Three's Company, the 70s sitcom that inspired the restaurant's name? Or the very slick-looking black-and-white logo? 

Absolutely nothing. With logom on the menu, a Swedish street snack comprising a hot dog, shrimp salad, and mashed potatoes in a tortilla, let's call Jack's Bistro eclectic.

Chef/owner Ted Stelzenmuller was one of my fellow judges during a recent battle of the Mason Dixon Master Chefs Tournament. (Although I could see him through the pass, I didn't alert him to my presence.) After hearing his critique of other chefs' food, I was curious to see what he could do with similar ingredients. With that in mind, I made sure one of us ordered the sous vide duck breast.

But first, we started off with a cocktail and a beer - the Camden, made with rye and orange, and a Brewer's Art Ozzy.

And then appetizers. I vacillated between the poutine and the mussel salad, with the latter winning out.

Chilled Panang Curry Mussel Salad - Kimchi, mint and basil, Panang curry, coconut milk, roasted peppers, fried shrimp cracker 

This dish was an odd juxtaposition of Korean and Thai flavors, however both sides were successful. The curry could have been both hotter and fishier, but there was no mistaking the very Thai flavor of kaffir lime. The kimchi was nearly perfect to my tastes - more fresh than fermented - but it, too, could have been spicier. Each of the two elements would be a good introduction to Korean or Thai food for the novice.  Together, however, they seemed more competitive than complimentary.

Mac & Cheese & Chocolate - Shell pasta, 5 cheese sauce, dark chocolate

As suspected, this was mostly weird.  It is aptly named, however. This dish is definitely mac & cheese "& chocolate" and not "chocolate mac & cheese."

Despite its almost universal popularity, chocolate can't be added willy-nilly to just any recipe. Its distinctive flavor is sometimes hard to integrate, and it basically just sat on top of the pasta. While the chocolate was pretty obvious, the cheeses were a little more difficult to discern. The taste was pure cream, apart from a slight smokiness in the background. I would have liked the smoky flavor to be more pronounced - perhaps it would have allowed the dusting of dark chocolate to be better integrated.

By the time we finished the dish, the chocolate had melted and become part of the sauce. This worked a bit better, but overall the dish is mostly a novelty.

Bistro Crab Cake - Dijon and horseradish sauce, arugula salad, roasted fingerling and red pepper and onion

No complaints here. This was a solid, fairly traditional, crab cake with lots of crab and little binder. The fingerlings were perfectly cooked and piping hot, and the creamy mustard sauce was a pleasant accompaniment, although the crab cake was so good, it didn't need a sauce at all. I only wish there had been a little acid on the salad.

Sous Vide Duck Breast - White corn, sour cream sauce, arugula and cherry tomato salad

The duck was our very first taste of meat that had been through the process of sous vide. While visually gorgeous, the dish didn't thrill us. Duck is one of those very versatile proteins that can be eaten rare or long-cooked. It's fabulous seared, or roasted, grilled, or stewed. Duck is poultry, and has a similar texture when cooked to turkey or chicken, although I would say the flavor is unlike either. This particular duck breast, cooked sous vide, didn't seem very duck-like at all. In fact, the texture was terribly close to ham - squishy and pink all the way through. It didn't even taste like duck. And I like a crust on my meat, thankyouverymuch; if this is what sous vide does to it, well, I'll pass, thanks.

A crisp bit of skin might have helped, but we were denied that. The corn and sour cream sauce also didn't help. It was so bland, I had to taste it a few times to really notice any corn flavor. Mr Minx and I had some white corn recently that was completely flavorless, and once again I will wonder out loud why people in this region insist on eating this insipid vegetable.

The arugula and tomato accompaniment were fine, but a little too repetitious considering I had the same things on my plate.

Durian Creme Brulee - Traditional creme brulee made with durian fruit

Finally, we come to dessert, and the main reason I wanted to eat at Jack's during Restaurant Week: the durian creme brulée. Neither Mr Minx nor I had ever tried the stinking fruit and we were very curious. I half expected to experience the proverbial reek of gym socks when we walked in the front door, but alas, the odor was well-contained. So well, in fact, that raising the pudding to my nose and sniffing it gave no indication that it contained anything other than cream and sugar.

Our waitress described the dessert's flavor as being mostly like a normal custard but with a weird garlic/onion background, but, to me, the durian flavor was more akin to something rotting. Rotting in a somehow pleasant way. The more I ate, the more I liked it. Apart from somewhat runny custard (I'm a firm believer in chilling the custard after bruléeing, as well as before, to re-harden any melting), this was shockingly good.

Pink Peppercorn & Lavender Ice Cream - warm sugar cookie

And then we have Mr Minx's shocking pink dessert. While the first bite was rather like eating a bar of soap, the rosemary-meets-perfume-like flavor of lavender grew on us after several tastes. The fresh-from-the-oven sugar cookie, reminding me of a chip-less Toll House cookie, was dreamy.

Mr Minx went so far as to say this was his favorite dish of the night. But then he doesn't like ham.

So, Jack's Bistro. Interesting. Eclectic. A couple of pretty good dishes and a couple that had unreached potential. And sous vide duck. Despite the duck, I'd go back to try some of the items from their non-Restaurant Week menu, like the ground bacon burger, the poutine, and maybe even that hot dog with shrimp salad on top.

Jack's Bistro
3123 Elliott Street
Baltimore, MD 21224
410-878-6542

A Better Crabcake

Last night we stopped off at the Double T Diner on Joppa Road for a bite to eat before grocery shopping. While Mr Minx opted for the meatloaf sandwich (chewy meatloaf, weird gravy) I ordered a single broiled "jumbo lump" crabcake. What I got was about 4" across, 1" thick, and filled with huge lumps of crab. There was also a substantial amount of mushy breading. Personally, I'd dump the breading and serve a mostly meat cake 2/3 the size. It at least tasted good.

About 10 years ago, when this particular Double T opened, it was owned by a different family than the one who owns it now. The menu was different, and their specials could be truly special. My favorite was the crab balls. For about $11, one got three small round crab cakes in a lemon butter sauce, plus soup, salad, veg, and potato. The crab cakes were absolutely scrumptious. And probably a loss leader. Eventually things changed, prices went up, and quality went down.

I've never been impressed by the Double Ts. I think the Nautilus in Timonium and the Broadway on Eastern Ave do a much better job of food.

Crab Cakes

Knowing we had a can of crabmeat in the fridge, I flipped through a few cookbooks to see what I could do with it. Good old Bobby Flay's Mesa Grill cookbook had the answer for me yet again. Blue cornmeal crabcakes with mango salsa. I happened to have a ripe mango in the house as well, plus scallions, cilantro, and lime, so it seemed like a Flay-esque meal was going to be happening.

But as I read through the ingredients, I realized I would have to make a hell of a lot of substitutions. The crab cakes called for prepared horseradish, dijon mustard, creme fraiche or sour cream, and blue cornmeal. I didn't have horseradish, but I did have horseradish mustard. No sour cream, but I had a container of goat cheese yogurt. And no blue cornmeal, of course, but I had a box of polenta.

Flay suggested that in addition to the mango salsa a smoked red pepper sauce be used on the plates. There weren't any bell peppers in my house at all, but I did have some of Cajun Kate's spicy tomato glaze, which I doctored up with a chipotle en adobo, a bit of mayo to cut the sweet, and a pinch of smoked salt.

They were good, but nothing beats a crab cake made with fresh blue crab, using the recipe on the back of the Old Bay can....

Service? What's That?

Last night I went out to dinner with my friend Stacey and her friend Alex. Friday night at 7pm is a bad time for dining out in Baltimore if one doesn't have a reservation, but we gave it a shot. Alex wanted seafood, mentioning crab cakes in particular, so I did a quick Google search to see where they might be found in the northern Baltimore County area. I knew Ocean Pride would be packed, and they were. We definitely didn't want to wait 45 minutes, so headed further up York Road. I had never been to Michael's Café, but read that they had crabcakes, so we gave it a go. Unfortunately for us, they could accomodate us right away. At least, we got to sit down. Actual accomodation was a long time in coming.

Right away, our waitress came up to recite a list of specials in her bizarrely nasal Minnie Mouse with strep throat voice. She took Alex's drink order for an iced tea and left. A minute or so later, she brought the tea, and a small plate of butter, and then disappeared for a bit. Which was fine. Since one of us is constantly talking, I needed the extra time to grab a minute here and there to actually concentrate on the menu. Bread eventually came, but Minnie Mouse disappeared fast without taking our order. After what seemed like an eternity, she returned and we requested the seared Ahi tuna, calamari, and crab/shrimp dip appetizers. Alex and I ordered crab cakes for our entrees, and Stacey decided on scallops. And because some of us really needed a drink, I selected a bottle of Ravenswood Zinfandel, very nicely priced at $25.

Alex's side salad came first, a decent-enough looking mix of greens and other salad veggies, with dressing on the side. Unfortunately, it looked as if the dressing cup had come off of someone else's plate - it was barely half-full. Alex wanted extra dressing, so needed the waitress. When she arrived with our wine (presenting it to Stacey, even though I was the one who ordered it), her response to the request for extra dressing was, "no." Considering we had been sitting in the restaurant for about 45 minutes already and had only gotten one salad, some rolls, and now wine, I didn't think Minnie had any right to attempt humor. She did bring the dressing with the appetizers, which we fell upon with vigor.

The ahi tuna was quite nice, albeit outrageously priced at $12. (One can get a more generous portion of even o-toro for less at a reputable sushi restaurant.) Seven long thin slices of tuna, raw in the middle and crusted with peppercorns and sesame seeds, lay atop mesclun greens dressed in a nice soy vinaigrette, with small dollops of wasabi sauce and a Thousand Island-looking aioli at the compass points. The tuna was delicious, as were the greens, and a larger portion of both would have made a nice dinner in itself. The menu claims that the calamari is "hand breaded," but I believe those hands worked for a frozen seafood plant somewhere far away. The adequate portion of squid, both rings and tentacles, were unexceptional, the bland breading tasting of nothing, and the accompanying marinara was merely something red and wet in which to dip the seafood. As for the crab and shrimp dip, I was hard-pressed to find any actual seafood in the pink-colored cream cheese goo, but it was tasty enough slathered on the crisp slices of garlic bread that came with it.

Surprisingly, the entrees came not long after the dinner plates were cleared. At least the kitchen's timing was good, if not the waitress'. Each of us got two vegetables with our protein, but somehow my green beans ended up on Alex's plate. Minnie Mouse went to fetch some for me and actually did arrive before I was finished eating. My single crab cake was full of lump crab, with very little binder, but it was overall fairly bland and needed more seasoning of some sort. The side of tartar sauce tasted weird, and I didn't bother with the cocktail sauce, since I don't think it goes with crabcakes. The potato, baked in foil, was predictably arid, but the beans, once they arrived, were cooked perfectly crisp and bright green; slicked with a touch of fat of some sort, all they needed was a bit of salt to bring out their flavor. Stacey's scallops came in a ghost-white creamy wine sauce, but the generous portion was well-cooked and flavorful. Her side of beets came from a can. Alex did not comment on the quality of her entree, but I did notice her request for mayonnaise (presumably for her fries) was never fufilled.

Minnie Mouse's appearances at our table were sporadic, and she never seemed to be around when we needed her. For instance, when our appetizers arrived, she still had not brought Stacy a place setting or napkin. After her fork ended up with the dirty appetizer dishes, she was not given a replacement with which to eat her entree until she managed to flag someone down. When pouring my wine, Minnie slopped it all over the base of my glass, and I was afraid to lift it lest I dribble on my shirt. She offered to bring a napkin to clean it, but that took 10 minutes. By the end of the meal, we were completely exasperated and opted to find dessert elsewhere. It was close to 9:30 p.m. when we left the restaurant, and I noticed the table next to ours was turned over twice while we were there. Oddly enough, they had the same waitress.

Although parts of the meal were enjoyable, I can't say I plan to return to Michael's Café. It's a standard, run-of-the-mill Maryland seafood restaurant, somewhat dingy, with mostly unexceptional food and poor service. We were seated within sniffing distance of the restrooms (which are badly located behind a short partition and which open directly into the dining room) and practically on top of a service station with various piles of whatnot on it but not useful things like napkins and silverware. Some attention to detail was evident in the meal: the green beans; the nice crisp dinner rolls; the perfectly cooked tuna. But other signs suggested the kitchen was on auto-pilot: the half-full salad dressing; the canned beets; the dull calamari. I can't blame the fact that it was prime time on a Friday night - the place was full but not busy, there was no line to get in, and the pace overall seemed to be quite leisurely. Nobody looked harried, distraught, or overworked.

Michael's is a place that has its regulars, and indeed I knew one gentleman who confessed to eating there every weekend, at the bar. That's well and good for them, if they like what they get. They can have it.

Michael's Cafe Raw Bar & Grill
2119 York Rd
Timonium, MD 21093
(410) 252-2022

Another Reason to Hate Rachael Ray

...and the Food Network doesn't score too well in this one either.

On a recent episode of RR's Tasty Travels, perky Ms Ray extolled the virtues of Faidley's crab cakes. The images shown on the screen at this time were of a fried hockey puck with a pale golden color and somewhat sandy texture, and of Nancy Devine strenuously beating a smooth mixture in a large bowl. Ms Ray's voiceover then continued on to the Baltimore tradition of coddies, while the video displayed large, lumpy, dark golden brown blobs studded with white lumps.

Can't tell the difference between a crab cake and a coddie, eh, Rachey? Let me help you a bit then.

These are actual samples of a crabcake and a coddie from Faidley's. On the left, we see a lovely specimen of Crabcake, lumpy with snowy white hunks of backfin, lovingly and gently (so as not to break up the crab lumps) formed into a large mound, and fried until a deep golden brown. On the right, we see a Coddie, fairly smooth-textured because it's made from cod flakes and mashed potato, and flattened so it fits nicely between two saltines.

I realize that Ms. Ray probably never ran the gauntlet of drug dealers outside Lexington Market to set foot into Faidley's, so she never got to see the crabcakes and coddies in person. But the idiots from Food Network sure did. Do they think the viewing public is so naive to believe when she speaks of food as if she is familiar with it, she actually is? Unfortunately, most of her viewers are that naive. And now millions of them, taken in by her cutesy proclamations of "yum-o!" are just as confused as she is.

Now, maybe she did the voice over bit blindly, without seeing the footage, and had no idea that the editing would make her sound stupid to food-savvy Marylanders. But if my name were on the masthead of the show, I'd damn well want to view a final cut before the pulic got to see it. And shouldn't the Food Network employ some sort of fact checkers, to confirm the veracity of statements being made on their programs?

Or am I just expecting too much from a network whose idea of entertainment is sending various individuals around the country to taste restaurant food?

The Crabcake that Ate Baltimore

But it was an enormous crabcake! Seriously!

We took my Mother-in-Law out for her birthday yesterday (and despite celebrating on 6-6-06, she's a lovely person and the sweetest MIL anyone could ask for). She chose a new-ish restaurant called By the Docks, way out on Eastern Boulevard in Essex, past the waste water treatment plant, past Martin's airport, and almost to Bengie's drive-in. Pretty much the edge of the universe, and just about as far East as I am willing to travel. Mom told me that when she made our 6 p.m. reservation, she was informed that it would be held for fifteen minutes only and would be given away after that point; I laughed. Why would a hole-in-the-wall in Essex have a crowd at 6 o'clock on a Tuesday? But when we got there, the parking lot was packed. Luckily, we arrived a mere 10 minutes late and were ushered by a bored teenager to our window table in the cramped and noisy dining room.

My friend Jill, who had eaten at By the Docks on her birthday just two days prior, said the restaurant wasn't very relaxing. She didn't elaborate, so I assumed that the decor was spartan or ugly and the chairs were hard. It was rather drab - a large square room painted a pale blue, with little ornamentation but for a large sailfish and a couple of small prints. Not exactly cozy, but it was actually the noise factor that made the place un-relaxing. Customers, packed cheek-to-jowl at tables both in the main dining room and upstairs, chattered quite loudly, laughing and having a good time. It was irritating, but the most annoying sound was the clatter of ceramic dishes and flatware being tossed into plastic bins by the busy busboys. I cringed every time a table was cleared. The din was so bad, I had to strain to hear my brother-in-law speaking, and he was mere inches away. Across the table, the conversation between my husband and his mother sounded like faraway whispers.

But let's get to the food here, shall we? By the Docks is your typical Baltimore seafood restaurant: crabcakes, a broiled seafood platter, and stuffed shrimp, a couple of steaks, and some token pasta dishes. Entrees came with a salad and a choice of "vegetable." I put the word in quotes because I don't consider baked potatoes, french fries, or applesauce to be veggies. Cole slaw barely passes. And the veg du jour - corn, most likely canned and served in a bowl of it's own juices - is an insult. Would making some steamed broccoli or asparagus really hurt that much? Don't Baltimorons *like* green vegetables?

Anyway.... Jill recommended the crabcakes, saying they were very large and full of meat, but rather light on the seasonings. Three of us opted for that, and my BIL Craig decided on scallops.

The crabcakes were absolutely huge. A normal entrée had two golden-brown softball-sized mounds of meat, garnished with an unattractive pile of shredded carrot and two lemon wedges. My crabcakes were stuck together, and they had ragged square edges, as did those of Neal and Flo. I imagine that huge ice-cream scoops of crabcake mixture were placed side-by-side on a baking sheet and broiled en masse. Whatever the method, the cakes were obscenely large. And...they were good. There was very little filler and the meat actually seemed to be backfin. There was even a little crab mustard here and there. It was almost as if they picked the crabs themselves, the lumps were so large and intact. They were very mildly seasoned, but the restaurant thoughtfully provided shakers of Old Bay along with the usual salt and pepper on every table.

The cole slaw, which came in a separate bowl, diner-style, was minced so finely it was practically a puree. It was fairly dry and mostly flavorless.

Craig's scallops also arrived as a large portion, a bowl heaped high with half-dollar sized shellfish dusted with an afterthought of paprika, garnished with more shredded carrots. They were perfectly cooked, but a tad on the bland side. Our waitress, who had never eaten much seafood in her youth, wanted to know how we'd describe scallops to someone who had never eaten them before. She said the best she could come up with was "Old Bay-flavored Jell-O," a description I found extremely unappetizing.

I was able to eat one of my crabcakes and Flo could only finish half of her single. Neal did a more admirable job and got partway through cake #2. The rest was packed into foam take-out containers. And I will feast on my leftovers for lunch today.

So after reading about our orgy of crab, you probably want to know the bottom line. Well, the crabcake platter, with a salad and "vegetable" cost a whopping $21.95. The whole bill, for four dinners, two iced teas, a Scotch and water, and a glass of wine was just under $92. No wonder the place is crowded on a Tuesday - bountiful seafood at ridiculously reasonable prices.

Maybe next time we'll try the $18.95 24-ounce Porterhouse....

By the Docks
3321 Eastern Blvd
Middle River, MD 21220
(410) 686-1188